PLEASE PRINT

Every morning, in first grade, the teacher would print our names on the chalkboard and we were all supposed to print our name underneath.  My classmates were able to print their names almost perfectly. I couldn't.  My attempts to print my name looked like chicken scratches.    I knew what the teacher wanted, but my brain could not get my hand to cooperate. It was humiliating to have to try, and fail, every day while the other children were successful/

My teacher didn't realize how hard I was trying to print my name like everyone else.  She did nothing to encourage me.  I think that was disgusted by the fact that I couldn't print my name

This morning ritual went on for months. Finally, I did it.  I printed my name on a workbook.  The teacher saw what I had done. There were no words of praise to acknowledge what a struggle learning to print my name had been for me.  Her response was,  "Well, was that so hard?"   Clearly, she was clueless.

In second grade I learned to use an electric typewriter.  I didn't have to worry if I could write or not. I could express myself and complete my classwork like everyone else. 

I was chosen to have my picture in the School and Home Newspaper. using my electric typewriter.  This was quite an honor for a seven-year-old. The photographer and the physical therapist came to my classroom.   I was supposed to type as if no one was watching me.  The photographer snapped the picture.  my physical therapist got angry because I'd hit the wrong key. (This woman wore her hair in a bun all year, but she took her hair down once a year to be a witch in my school's Halloween parade. I'm not kidding. All she needed was a broom. The day the photo was taken, the witch appeared a little early.)  Why couldn't she have been happy that my picture would be published and that I'd be representing the school?

I know the teachers in the sixties did the best they could, but, I still wonder where the compassion and understanding was.  It took me a little longer than my classmates to learn to print my name but I did it.  That should have been what mattered,





   

INCLUSION IS A BEAUTIFUL THING

Sadly, there are still people in the world, who think that disabled children should not be mainstreamed.  They think that having disabled children in a class, with their able-bodied peers, is a distraction.  Teaching a disabled child takes too much of a teacher's time.   

Those against mainstreaming argue that the time should be spent teaching an able-bodied child. 

What about the positive things a child with a disability can add to a classroom? Children learn compassion, acceptance, and the importance of helping one another when a child with a disability attends class with them.  If children have a disabled child in a class with them, they will grow up with the awareness that a person with a disability is just like they are. 

l loved being a Brownie/Girl Scout.   The experience was one of the happiest times of my childhood.  The Brownie troop leader was a member of my church.  The week before I attended my first meeting, the troop leader talked to the girls about me.  I don't know what she told them,  all I know is they accepted me and always found a way for me to be a part of whatever they were doing.  The girls didn't see my disability.  They just accepted me as their friend. 

I'm sure you have heard about the high school student, with Down's Syndrome, who was voted homecoming queen by her classmates this year.    The fact that able-bodied students elected a young woman with a disability to be homecoming queen is awesome!  The students voted for her not because she was disabled, but because of the kind of person she is. The students saw a person first, not her disability.  I hope we see more acts like this in the future. 

 I attended a public school for the physically disabled for thirteen years.  I would have given anything had mainstreaming been an option back then.  Had I been mainstreamed,  I would have developed better social skills.  My grade school education was adequate,  My high school education left me unprepared for college.  

After my freshman year, the high school teacher left.  The teacher who taught Spanish, and Shakespeare and for whom writing a term paper was a requirement to graduate,  was replaced by teachers who only taught the basics. They did nothing to prepare anyone for college.  I understand why.  When you have students at all different levels of intellectual ability together, it would be difficult to meet all of their needs effectively.  I missed out on a lot, not only socially, but academically as well. The only positive thing about my high school years was that, in my senior year, I was able to take two courses at a community college in college preparation that fall.

I often wonder what my educational experience would have been like if I had been allowed to be mainstreamed.  Would being mainstreamed have made me a different person?  I'll never know how it might have benefitted me.

For anyone who thinks a child with a disability is a distraction in the classroom and should not be mainstreamed, remember the qualities I spoke about earlier.  Aren't those qualities we want all children to have?  If you think about what an able-bodied child can learn from a disabled child they are not a distraction in the classroom at all.  They will only enhance another child's educational experience.

A WAKE-UP CALL

There is an issue facing our county that is of great concern to me. That issue is the future of health care for the disabled. Medicaid.

While I'm not on Medicaid the majority of disabled people I know are.  Services should not be cut. all states should provide funding for Medicaid. 

I was watching the news last week when I noticed the crawl at the bottom of the screen.   If I read it correctly,  it said that the state of Missouri would begin considering putting disabled individuals into managed care facilities in 2013.  I'm assuming this means people with chronic or pre-existing conditions. 

Disabled people deserve good health care choices. They should not be penalized for not being able to work a full-time job.  And, they most definitely should not be warehoused in managed care facilities just to cut costs.

 Lawmakers forget that the disabled community is a community of people who deserve the same rights as everyone else.  The United States is always ready to help other countries.  Yet, lawmakers would consider cutting or changing services to the disabled citizens of their own country.  It just doesn't seem right or fair to me.

I went to a state agency several months ago and asked if I could get a little assistance from them in paying a portion of my monthly home care bill. I was told to get any help from them at all I'd have to be totally on Medicaid.  I have always tried to be a productive member of society. I can understand why a lot of disabled people don't work.  They are afraid of losing their government assistance. 

Having a disability is enough of a challenge.  Disabled people deserve to have a good quality of life.  They shouldn't have to worry about changes or cuts to their services.  Before lawmakers make cuts or changes to services for the disabled they need to stop for a moment and remember, "There But For The Grace Of God Go I." 

HOME IS WHERE MY HEART IS

People's houses are made of bricks, mortar, plaster, wood, and paint.  Four walls and a roof.   A place to live.  I have lived in the same house all of my life. My house is much more to me than that.

Behind a door in my family room, you'll see where my mom measured how tall my brothers and I were.  Our height is written in pencil with the year on the wall.   I remember being supported against the wall while my height was recorded.  Numbers and initials that wouldn't mean anything to anyone else, but they mean something to me. I find comfort in knowing they are there.

Thanksgiving was a joint effort between my mother and grandmother.  (Really all holidays were a joint effort between them.)  It meant getting out the big Nesco cooker to cook the bird in.  One year, the turkey was so big, the lid had to be tied down.

If I close my eyes I  see the living room decorated and the big Christmas tree in front of the picture window. I remember the year my dad got one of those silver trees with the rotating color wheel. My dad thought it looked great.  My older brothers were horrified.  Christmas Eve, they brought home the discarded tree from the neighborhood school.  It was HUGE and seemed to cover half of our family room because it came out so far, but we had a green tree that year. It was great!!  

Easter meant Mom's lamb cake.  It was a two-day process.  On the first day, she baked them in a cast iron mold that was given to my grandfather and was almost as old as my mother.  The second day she iced and decorated them. 

My last birthday party was given to me when I was ten. My cake had a ballerina figurine on top. My mom got a clown to entertain me and the other children. (I never liked clowns but this one was okay.)

My mom considered moving when I graduated from high school. She just made the house more accessible for me.

I close my eyes and I see everything.  The memories comfort me and bring me peace.  Living in the house I grew up in has allowed me to be able to function and build a life for myself since my mother's death two and a half years ago.  I don't know if I would have made it.  I know nothing lasts forever, but I do know wherever I go in the future,  The house that I grew up in will always be home to me.

PUSH GIRLS

Sundance Channel's new reality show, Push Girls, follows the lives of Tiphany, Auti, Mia, Angela, and Chelsie. Five women who don't let the fact that they are paralyzed and in wheelchairs stop them from doing anything they want to do.

After five minutes of watching the show, you realize that their chairs are just an accessory, much like earrings or a purse. (Okay, maybe that's a bad analogy, but you get the idea.) Their chairs do not define who they are. They are five women who face life's challenges with a positive attitude. The girls can do just about anything, they may just do it a little differently.

I cheered when Auti won first place in a ballroom dance contest competition. It was my favorite episode featuring Auti. It was so cool that she competed against able-bodied dancers and won! She had been a professional dancer before her accident. Auti taught herself how to do hip-hip dance moves in her chair and created a wheelchair hip-hop dance team called Colors 'n' Motion. The group puts on shows to raise awareness and show what people with disabilities can do. She had a role in the independent film, Musical Chairs, and is working on a CD. She calls herself a diva because she likes to take charge but, in my opinion, Auti is a diva with a heart of gold.

Unlike the other girls, who became paralyzed in car accidents, Mia became paralyzed when a blood vessel ruptured in her spinal cord. Before she became paralyzed Mia was a competitive swimmer. . My favorite Mia moment was watching her compete in a swim meet. Watching Mia achieve her goal of competing again was so thrilling. I was on Team Mia, shouting "Go Mia" as I watched. It didn't matter what place she finished in, what mattered is that she did it. Mia also went kayaking on a date. She was and is fearless. I cannot wait to see what sport Mia conquers next!

Tiphany attended her high school reunion which happened to take place on the same day as the anniversary of her accident. I think it took tremendous strength and courage for Tiphany to return to her high school and face her classmates. Then she had the courage to drive by the site of her accident and have all the feelings and emotions connected with that day come to the surface again. It was something she knew she had to do so she could move forward with her life. It was very emotional for Tiphany and her dad. I cried with them. I applaud Tiphany for allowing cameras to film such personal scenes.

Since her accident, Chelsie speaks at school assemblies about the dangers of drinking and driving. She has been interviewed by Seventeen Magazine. Chelsie also loves to dance. She would like to attend college and study communications and business. Her accident happened just over two years ago and the girls offer her support and friendship as she learns to deal with the challenges of her new life. My favorite episode featuring Chelsie was when the girls went high heel shopping with her. Just because you're in a chair doesn't mean you can't still be fun, sexy and feminine. Whatever Chelsie does, I know she has a bright future ahead of her.

Angela had a lucrative career in modeling before her accident. Her dream was to return to modeling. There aren't many calls for models in wheelchairs. One agency Angela called told her she could come in. When asked if they were accessible they told her the agency was accessible. The agency's idea of accessibility included a staircase. Angela didn't give up. Her tenacity paid off. On the season finale, Angela flew to New York to do a photo shoot for a national campaign for Nordstrom Department Stores. Angela's success is a perfect example of why you should never give up. With determination, you can achieve your dreams.

It took me a long time to finish this blog. Everything I wanted to say sounded cheesy. I wanted to say more than I love Push Girls and everyone should watch the show. I love it because the girls support each other. They are there for each in good times and bad. Push Girls shows that disabled people want the same things that everyone wants. To be accepted, to be loved and to be thought of as people first and disabled second. As the girls say, "If you can't stand up, stand out."

Thank you, Tiphany, Auti, Angela, Mia and Chelsie for letting us into your lives. Season one was awesome. I can't wait for season two.

www.sundancechannel.com/pushgirls

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ADA

The Americans With Disabilities Act became law on July 26, 1990. The purpose of the law is to ensure that the disabled live in a society that is accessible to them. 

The ADA covers employment, accessibility of state and local government buildings, any restaurant or store as well as public and private transportation services. The law ensures that anywhere telephone services are given to the public, telephone relay services are given to anyone who is hearing impaired. In short, anything that is available to the able-bodied should be made available to those with a disability as well. No one with a disability should be discriminated against for trying to have their rights upheld.

The law has come a long way, but still has a long way to go, particularly in terms of architecture and quality transportation services. Last year, I went to a restaurant that had steps to get to the front door. The restaurant staff offered to pick me up in my motorized wheelchair and carry me up the steps to the inside. I declined their offer. My chair is heavy and I didn't want anyone getting hurt. There are many people with chairs larger than mine. Carrying a chair up steps can be difficult for those offering assistance and scary for the person in the chair. The restaurant staff then directed us to an entrance where I assume deliveries are made. I had to drive down a steep ramp and then go through the restaurant kitchen. When I was little going through a restaurant kitchen to get to the dining area was a common occurrence for me, but in 2011, I never dreamed I'd still have to go through a kitchen. When we left, I did let the restaurant staff carry me down the front entrance steps. because the ramp for the delivery entrance scared me and I felt being carried down the steps would be quicker and safer.

Earlier this year I wanted to have little chocolate teddy bears made as I was having a book signing. Since my children's book, The Busy World of Bianca Bear, is about the adventures of a little pink bear I thought it would be nice to have chocolate teddy bears on my signing table for anyone who stopped by. I called a candy store near my house and they told me they had teddy bears and I should come in and look at their selection. I wanted to stop in, but when we went by, the building was not accessible. I don't even think there was a curb cut and I know there was a step to get in. I called to complain and was given a voicemail. I left a message explaining my situation along with my contact information. I never heard from them. I was very disappointed that the store. didn't care enough to return my call and address my concerns.

I am fortunate enough to have an accessible van and caregivers to drive me where I need to go. Most disabled people are not so lucky. They must depend on public transportation, buses, and Call-A-Ride. I have been told the lifts on buses are always broken. I have also heard horror stories concerning Call-A-Ride. They can be either fifteen minutes early or fifteen minutes late in picking a passenger up. A rider must be outside and waiting no matter what the weather. Call-A-Ride maybe an hour or two late and it may be raining, but a rider must be outside waiting for the van otherwise the van will leave them. The rider will get a warning letter. If they are late again they will be suspended for some time. If a rider misses a van, it may be several hours before another van is available to pick them up. I know of someone who didn't make it to their doctor's appointment because Call-A-Ride was late picking them up. By the time they arrived at the doctor's office, the office was closed. Call-A-Ride left the person outside and it was getting dark. Thankfully, another van picked them up in a few minutes. A rider may have to transfer several times before reaching their destination. Again, they must wait outside, no matter what the weather, for the next van or the van will leave. My friend was hurt due to an inexperienced driver who didn't secure their chair in the van properly. Call-A-Ride paid their medical expenses.

Disabled people deserve safe, dependable transportation. There are a few accessible .taxis now, but they can be expensive. Every building needs to have a safely accessible entrance. I realize money is tight and budgets are being cut, but something needs to be done so that disabled people can continue to lead independent and productive lives.

BULLIES CAN HAVE A DISABILITY.

If you think kids with disabilities do not bully their disabled peers. You are wrong. If you think kids with disabilities are accepting and understanding of their disabled peers. Think again. Bullying is not just an abled-bodied kids' problem. Bullying does not discriminate. Kids with disabilities can be bullies too.

I attended a public school for the physically disabled from 1963 to 1976.  Every child who went to the school had a disability You'd have expected that the children would support each other. They would have compassion for one another because they understood what it was like to be disabled.   I am sorry to tell you that was not true. 

I startle very easily.  Any loud noise can cause me to jump.  Children intentionally drop books on the floor to see me jump and laugh hysterically. It was the funniest thing they had ever seen.  Some adults took great pleasure in making me jump as well. 

I was not boy crazy  I was wrapped up in the celebrities I saw on T.V.  I was made fun of. I was called names. I was laughed at by the other white girls in school. Had it not been for a compassionate bus driver who stood up for me when he witnessed me being made fun of. Had it not been for the friendship of several African American girls who accepted me for the person I was high school would have been a very lonely time for me.

I have a friend I have known all of my life.  We share the same disability.  We were very close when we were young.  My friend was allowed to attend a regular school long before mainstreaming became the norm.   During our teenage years, my friend began to distance herself from me, She chose her able-bodied friends over me. She was embarrassed by me.  I was the one who was disabled I used a power chair. My friend walked with crutches. My friend did not attend a "special" school. In her mind, my friend did not have a disability.

My advice to any young person who is being bullied is to find someone who accepts and supports you for the person you are.  You are unique.  Celebrate that. Be proud. 

Take it from me uniqueness or dare I say weirdness, is cool.   No one has the right to make another person feel inferior. You matter. 

To a child who bullies someone because they are different here is something to consider.  The way you treat people will come back to you positively or negatively.  Treat everyone with respect and dignity Be a friend to the new kid. Be a friend to the kid everyone in your class thinks is weird. Don't be a bully. Don't be a follower Set a good example. Be a leader.

Be kind. Be accepting. Be respectful. You'll feel so much better.