WE STILL HAVE A LONG WAY TO GO

It was a beautiful day.  The sky was blue and the temperature was in the seventies with a light breeze.  A perfect fall day.  I was happy because I'd had a book signing at a friend's bookstore.  A couple of people came in and bought my book and three had been sold since the last time I'd been in, making a total of five books sold. It had been a nice afternoon visiting with Robin, the owner, and selling books. The perfect day until ... 

My caregiver and I decided to go out for dinner to a well-known seafood restaurant.  We were taken to a table. A few minutes later our server came and asked what we would like to drink.  I always have a glass of wine if I go out to dinner on a Saturday.  I told our server the wine that I wanted, at which time, he glanced at my caregiver with a look that asked, "Is it okay for her  to have wine?"  My caregiver nodded that it was and our server brought my glass of wine.

This may not seem like a big deal, but every time an incident like this occurs, I'm reminded that there are still some people who view me as different from everyone else.  People who see the wheelchair and make assumptions that I can't think for myself.That I wouldn't know not to order a glass of wine if there were some medical reason why  I shouldn't.

Several weeks earlier, we were at the same restaurant and our server was speaking to my caregiver about my order rather than to me.  I asked our server to speak to me directly.  I was clear about what I wanted, but our server brought the wrong salad.  My caregiver told our server that I wanted shrimp in my salad, not chicken.  Our server offered to make another salad, but it would have taken too long.  I ate the salad with the chicken in it.  The good news, I was given a free dessert because of the error.

Disability awareness and sensitivity training workshops or speakers should be made available to anyone who is a restaurant employee. I don't know how realistic it is to expect managers to provide this kind of training.  I just know that it's needed. .I'm asking anyone reading this post, who is employed at a restaurant, to always remember to treat a person with a disability with the same dignity and respect that you would show any other patron you were serving.  Listen to them.  Don't assume that just because they have a disability, they can't think and speak for themselves.  

I always think we have come a long way.That people have changed their opinions about people with disabilities. That they know we're just like everyone else. We just do some things differently. Then, an incident happens, like the one that happened last Saturday,and I see, while we have come a long way in the acceptance of people with disabilities, we still have a long way to go.

THE MISS AMAZING PAGEANT

This video was featured on The Today Show.  http://www.today.com/news/miss-amazing-pageant-puts-girls-disabilities-first-8C11101506  It made me cry.  I saw young girls and women with disabilities competing in a beauty pageant.  As the contestants walked and rolled across the stage,. they were radiant not only in beauty but in confidence as well.

The pageant was started by Jordan Somer, who had been in pageants herself when she was younger. Competing in pageants taught her self confidence and commitment.  She learned that success wasn't about coming in first, but rather, about taking control over who she would become.  Ms. Somer has also worked with the Special Olympics where she saw first hand the determination and commitment of the athletes.  

Miss Somer wanted to share the pageant experience with girls who had disabilities. The first Miss Amazing Pageant was held in Nebraska in 2007.  The only requirement is that contestants give five cans of food. The first job of the pageant division winners is to distribute the cans of food to homeless shelters.  It's a way for the girls to be involved in their community and to learn about the importance of helping others and giving back.

The pageant builds self-confidence and self-esteem and promotes the inclusion of girls with disabilities in their community. Through the encouragement and support of the pageant organization, the girls strive to reach their full potential, to be the best that they can be in life.    Girls in the pageant learn they can set goals and achieve them. When I was watching the video I saw how proud and happy the contests were. They knew that they were just as good as anyone else.

http://missamazingpageant.com/about/

MY ROAD TO (PART TIME) EMPLOYMENT

I graduated from The George Warren Brown School of Social Work in nineteen eighty-two. In my last year of graduate school, I had two internships.  

My first internship was at a local children's hospital.  My boss took me on in the hopes of getting me a job as the social worker for Shriners Hospital.

In the 1980s the children's hospital was providing a social worker for Shriners. I met with the social worker at Shriners every Friday.  I had a good rapport with all the patients.  That stemmed from the fact that I had been a patient there.  The children knew that I could relate to what they were going through better than anyone else.  I led a weekly group for teenagers where they could come and share their feelings about being in the hospital. I enjoyed it immensely.

 Unfortunately, Shriners would not consider hiring me because I hadn't had two years of work experience.  When my boss at the children's hospital learned this she wouldn't give me any other responsibilities. Other than making phone calls to remind parents of their child's clinic appointments, I did very little.  The internship was supposed to last for two semesters, but my boss ended it after only one.

My second internship was at an organization that offers health care to low-income families. I was an intake worker.  My main job was to assess a client's needs and refer them to the appropriate place. I mainly gave out vouchers for food and bait to catch rats. The organization had no funds to pay me; however, they did offer me a volunteer position. I declined.

I was home for two years after graduation.  I sent out resumes and took the state tests but the only jobs I was ever offered were the jobs no one else wanted.  Night jobs and jobs at psychiatric facilities.   The last interview I went on was at a psychiatric hospital.  The position involved working with adolescent girls. When the interviewer asked me what I would do if one of the girls turned my chair over, I had no answer  The interview ended.  

I have shared in a previous post how I got my job at Meramec. An instructor gave up his lunch hour to teach me and other young women with disabilities word processing. The other two quit, but I stuck with it.  I saw a need for individualized instruction, especially for older adults, while volunteering in the computer lab. With the support of those in the lab, I developed the syllabus for the class and presented it to the dean.  The funding for my class almost got cut after the first semester.  Luckily that didn't happen The dean made sure I had a job, with Continuing Education, for as long as I wanted one. I retired in 2005 

I  tried to get a job as a sales rep for a well-known greeting card company.  The rep for the area was in her nineties.  She did almost everything out of her house and on a computer.  She told me the job would be too difficult for me during our phone conversation.   She did not afford me the opportunity to meet with her in person.

I'm now trying to become a freelance writer/journalist.   There may be rejections along the way. That's okay.  I just have to be patient. I know that it will happen.