MANNERS, A LOST ART?

A patron at the library on Friday, wanted assistance reserving time on a computer. They had attempted to do it on their own but were having difficulty. They were very frustrated. I told them that I would help them. I was moving out from behind the volunteer desk when I heard them say in a disgusted tone of voice, "Oh, never mind, I got it." I guess I hadn't moved fast enough for them. Was what they needed a computer for that urgent that they could not wait a few seconds for me to come over and help them?  What happened to politeness? Is it wrong to expect someone to be respectful when asking for help?

 I always say good morning to my aides. I ask how they are. Friday morning, it was as though I hadn't spoken to my aide at all. I repeated my greeting several times but did not get a reply. Sometimes, when I speak to my aide in the morning, their response is barely audible. I have gotten responses like,

"i don't have to talk to you" or " I don't feel like talking." Yet, they have no problem talking if another aide comes into the room. They carry on lengthy conversations. it's not that difficult to speak when you enter a resident's room. It shows respect for the person.

 I understand the staff's frustration at having many residents to care for and not enough help, but sometimes, I lose my temper. I am not proud of that. However, no matter how frustrated I get, I  always say please, thank you, and speak when someone enters my room.  It may not always seem like it, but I do appreciate the care I am given. 

Respect works both ways. To get respect from my aide I must treat them with respect. 

I will never forget the first time one of my friends called my mother by her first name. I knew they were not deliberately trying to disrespect my mother, but it still sounded so strange to me. I never called my friends parents by their first names. it took a while for me to feel comfortable hearing my friend do it.

I hope that we are teaching our children to be kind and respectful. I hope that they learn to be polite and to not always be in a hurry. I would hate to see manners become a lost art.