SEE ME

Mardi Gras fun at the nursing home

All of my life my inner voice has been screaming for people to SEE ME!!!. I am much more than my disability

I don't know how to embrace my spastic cerebral palsy. It's a part of me, like my brown eyes. I have tried to imagine what my life might have been like without it. I can't. Life with cerebral palsy is all I know  

There are perks to having cerebral palsy. I usually don't have to wait in long lines. This was definitely a perk when we visited The Disney Theme Parks. When I traveled I boarded the plane first. We were upgraded to the first-class section a few times. And, of course, the biggest perk is better parking spots.

 Society loves to label people. Labels make our society feel better. Society understands that I had been labeled "severely disabled." Society did not expect me to achieve very much.

The first time I realized I had been given the label "severely disabled." (I attended the public school for the physically disabled for thirteen years. I needed help with almost everything and I had not figured it out? How dense was I?) was when my mom and I were waiting in a vocational rehabilitation office to inquire about getting assistance in purchasing an accessible van. The counselor had not come in yet. I saw a file on the desk with my name on it. The words "severely disabled " were written on it. 

I freaked out saying, "Mom, that's not what I am is it?"

"No, that's just something they wrote down for their records. It doesn't mean anything," she said. 

I knew it did. It meant that society would always view me as different and make assumptions and judgments about me. It meant my inner voice would spend the rest of my life screaming to be heard.  While I continued to try to make people see me for the person I am.

I am not mentally challenged. Unfortunately, when many people see me that is what they think. 

I am an intelligent, funny, and creative woman who enjoys hanging out with friends. I like sushi, watching people sing karaoke, going to the movies, and eating out, Hurricanes, and Margaritas are my favorite cocktails.

The most difficult thing about living here is the lack of privacy.  That and the fact that when people here meet me for the first time most assume I'm mentally challenged. 
There goes my inner voice again. 

SEE ME.